Fated To The Alpha by Jessica Hall Chapter 141
His hands were gentle as he removed my shirt, he then pulled me to him before moving my hair aside and unclipping my bra and sliding it down my arms before dumping it on the floor. His hands run up my arms stopping at my shoulders and I shiver. My nipples hardened from the cold or maybe it was the shock that made me feel cold, yet his hands were warm but also never lingered on my skin too long.
“ Sage?” I look at him and he stares back at me as I try to decipher the look he is giving me.
“He wants permission? ” Sierra says, making my brows furrow.
“Permission for what?” I ask worriedly, he wouldn’t try to mate me?
“No to shower with you, he isn’t sure whether you want him to stay or not” Sierra answers and I could hear Donnie talking to her, she had grown quite attached to his wolf and Andrei never stopped his wolf from talking to her, even though it bugged me at first with how trusting my wolf is of them.
“Can I take these off?” Andrei asks, snapping me out of my head to see his hands on my hips. I suddenly felt awkward.
“Will you take yours off?” I ask him, not wanting to be the only one naked and baring all. I have always been body conscious, how could I not be when the majority of my body was covered in scars, especially my thighs and my womanhood. They made sure to mutilate me, it is amazing what wolfsbane can do to a werewolves body before they have shifted. The burns on my thighs were horrendous and without a wolf at the time I was never able to heal them.
Wolfsbane was like acid to werewolves and the plant in liquid form had the ability to melt flesh.
The plant itself was a purple flowering plant and just touching it caused pain and they used to love running the weed across my skin when I wouldn’t submit to them, wolfsbane had the ability to make you surrender your soul if needed, nothing burns like wolfsbane. I don’t even think fire itself would hurt as much as that stuff does, fire burns quickly. That plant is like burning to death by smoldering, cooking your flesh slowly at a blistering heat that moves slowly through your system making sure to burn every cell and nerve.
“Not if you don’t want me to, I can leave mine on” He says but I shake my head. I knew he would never hurt me, I truly believed that now. He has had multiple opportunities especially while I am sleeping but he never touched me inappropriately. Yet he still didn’t move to remove my pants yet I couldn’t bring myself to remove them and have him gawking at what they did to me so instead I reach for his belt and he grips my hands making me look at him.
“I can leave them on, ” He says.
“I don’t want to be the only one naked” I tell him and his brows lift but he lets my hands go letting me undo his pants. I pull his belt off before undoing the button on his jeans yet my hands shake terribly and eventually he undoes them, letting them fall to the floor before gripping my chin and tilting my face up.
“We don’t have to do anything, Sage, I would never force you to do anything you don’t want to do” Andrei says and I nod before chewing my lip. He had seen the top half of me but the bottom half was a thing of nightmares.
Would he be disgusted that I was used goods, mutilated? Would it disappoint him that I am actually useless as a woman, they made sure I could never have children and was just an object to torture and use as they pleased.
Would he reject me when he sees the scars between my h!ps, the scars and burns on my thighs and private area. I can’t give him an heir, and all Alpha’s need heirs and I was broken and of no use to him.
“What’s wrong, I can go” Andrei says when I still don’t move.
“He won’t care, Sage,” Sierra says.
“Did you tell Donnie?” I ask her and she shakes her head and I knew she feared the same thing.
“Well if he rejects us he will probably let us go so it won’t matter” Sierra says sadly not wanting to leave but she knew that wasn’t up to us once he realizes we can’t even perform what we are made for.
I swallowed down the lump forming in my throat. I suddenly didn’t want to leave either, the thought even occurred to me earlier when I thought he had some random rogue in the basement. I never thought once how I would get out but how I would get them out, I had no intention of leaving this
place yet now he may suddenly get rid of me when he knows.
Andrei reaches for my pants undoing the button before stopping and I stand letting him undo them. My heart rate skips a beat as I watch him kneel before tugging them down. I clench my eyes shut not wanting to see the disgust on his face. I hear his breath hitch as he makes a strangled noise before he growls. I flinched knowing I was about to receive his wrath.
Andrei grips my hips holding me still before pressing his lips to my stomach. I look down at him and he moves his nose across my skin, stopping where my ovaries are meant to be another reason I won’t allow him to mark me. Sierra thinks going into heat would be horrific since I can’t bear children, yet the wolf part of me would be demanding I mate even though it would be pointless.
His hands move down the outside of my thighs moving over the rough flesh that is marred from the wolfsbane, “Do the scars still hurt, I mean do you have nerve damage?” He asks, making me look at him.
“Pardon?” I ask, wondering if I heard him right and he looks down at my legs and I look away when he looks directly at my womanhood. I hated seeing what they did.
“ I mean am I hurting you if I touch you?” He asks.
“No, my skin doesn’t have much feeling, not the front anyway” I tell him looking at him. I still had
feeling at the back of my thighs but minimal at the front the scar tissue was that thick in some places.
“What about?” He didn’t finish but I knew he was asking if I had feeling between my legs.
“Yes I still have feeling unfortunately” I tell him and he looks up at me.
“That’s a good thing Sage” Andrei says and I shake my head.
“They have shown you only pain, I can show something else ” He says standing up, I look at him confused. “I can show you pleasure ” He whispers, pulling me in the shower with him.
Somehow I doubted that, I couldn’t see any way sex could be pleasureable when I had only felt pain associated with it. But most of all I was shocked he would even want to touch me.
“You’re not disgusted?”
“Why would I be, everyone has scars”
“You know I can’t have kids?” I ask him and his eyes darken but he nods. I knew that’s why he was sniffing my skin to see if I was still fertile.
“I don’t care, you are still mine” He says, pulling me against him. I rest my head on his chest before feeling him run the soap across my skin.
“Tomorrow you start training, I want you to train” Andrei says and I look up at him.
“I can go outside?” I ask him and he nods brushing my hair from my face that was sticking to me.
“I already made that mistake by leaving the women in my pack defenceless, I won’t make the same mistake again” He says pressing his lips to my temple.