21. Emotions & Promises
RAVEN
I reached over and took his hand. I don‘t care what anyone thought, I didn’t feel guilty about Liam‘ right now either, this was one friend to another. I needed to know, before we had this sit down, I wanted to know what was inside Damon‘s head, because I knew he wouldn‘t be able to be completely honest in front of Liam.
Damon stared down at our hands, before turning towards me and placing his mug down.
He blew out a breath before nodding.
“I messed up. Unlike Liam, who stayed true to you, I didn‘t... I feel fucking guilty for that, and it‘s no excuse...”
“But?” I asked softly, sensing his turmoil.
He was struggling to say what was deep in his heart.
‘Speak to me however you find easier.‘ I mind linked.
He looked into my eyes before looking down at his hands.
‘That night of the blood moon... I was scared I would lose my best friend, someone I considered a brother, my Alpha, whom i twas my duty to serve. I respect him and I would die for him...‘
The pain in his words squeezed at my own heart painfully.
Why did Selene do this?
‘I‘ve always loved you; you were always the warmth of our group. Kiara was the heart, but you were always that bright flame that wrapped us all in your warmth. I always thought... you know, maybe Kiara might be my mate and you would be Liam‘s. He’s always loved you after all.“.
He looked into my eyes, I gave him an encouraging nod to continue. He sighed heavily, looking down at our hands once more.
‘But after Dad died, I started seeing you fucking differently and with it, it became more... There was a small part of me that was greedy and hoped that maybe you might be mine. I know I was fucking wrong to wish like that when Liam has–‘
‘Don‘t. Don‘t put yourself down like that.‘ I whispered.
His words had sent a storm of emotions through me, and with i t, his pain was so obvious. He nodded and continued.
- 2.
‘But then you were mated to us both. I didn‘t know what to think but I was ready to accept it instantly. Then when Liam walked away, I felt like my worst fucking nightmare had just come true. Everything went out of control, and I felt like I just didn‘t fit into the equation... You are Luna material, Liam is an Alpha who obviously doesn‘t want to share... and with his Beta? Why should he? I’m like the third wheel in this entire equation that shouldn‘t be here.‘
He swallowed and his grip on my hand tightened.
But still... I wish we could make it work.’ He said quietly, looking straight into my eyes.
“Me too... You are not a third wheel. Don’t ever feel like you are not enough or that you are below someone else.” I replied firmly, so happy that he had opened up to me.
Al‘s words rang in my mind once again, making my heart skip a beat.
“What is it?” He asked softly.
I shook my head, and he tilted his.
“Now you can‘t go around having double standards, beautiful. I shared, your turn...”
“I‘m just... scared... What if Liam doesn‘t want to listen?” I asked, the fear I had been trying to suppress for so long coming to the surface.
He raised my hand to his lips, kissing it gently, sending tingles of pleasure through me.
“I promise you, you won‘t have to ever choose between us. No matter what.” He said with a soft smile, yet there was a confidence in those words, although I couldn‘t understand the emotions in his eyes.
Despite that smile, despite the love and warmth on his face, I felt a sliver of doubt.
Why did those words of his scare me?
“Now shall we drink that hot chocolate and actually watch this movie?” He asked.
I smiled, pushing my doubts away, feeling a lot better.
“Sounds like a plan, but I get to choose the movie!” I said, grabbing the remote.
“That isn‘t fair!”
“Life isn‘t fair, dear boy.” I said, smiling as he chuckled.
Please, Selene, let stuff work out... Please...
––—–
Training was over and I felt exhausted. I had ended up falling asleep at Damon‘s, waking up to find that I was in his bed, but he wasn‘t there. I came downstairs to see he had slept on the sofa. I had thanked him before rushing from the house to get t o training on time.”
I had just returned to the packhouse when I saw Liam leaning against the wall near my door.
“Hey, you didn‘t come home last night, everything ok?”
My heart skipped a beat, and although I shouldn‘t feel bad,
something about those sharp cerulean eyes watching me made my heart thump.
“Yeah, I was at a friend‘s and ended up falling asleep watching a movie.” I said, praying that Damon‘s scent wasn’t all over m
A prayer that was in vain. The moment I opened the door to m y room, moving past him, I heard him inhale and knew he had caught the scent. His eyes blazed a deep magnetic blue and the surge of power that rolled off of him made my heart thump.
“Damon‘s.” He stated, his voice full of such anger that I wasn‘t sure if it was smart to speak.
“Yes.” I simply said, about to close the door behind me when his hand shot out, forcing it open. “What are you doing, Liam?
“Tell me, Raven, do you want Damon?”
What the hell?
I moved back, wanting to put space between us.
“You are both my mates, Liam, and I love you both. Don‘t do this.” I said firmly yet quietly.
“Love us both? You don‘t love two people at once, it‘s not possible.”
“It is.”
“Not in the same way.” He said quietly, his eyes raking over m e. For training, I had borrowed Aunty Monica‘s leggings and one of Damon‘s oversized shirts to put on top, but it had clearly been a bad, bad idea...
His fury was only heightening as he glared at me. “You ARE
mine, Raven, and only mine. I swear, I‘ll destroy anything that stands in my way.” He hissed, his hand wrapping around my throat. His grip was tight yet not painful.
My chest was pounding as I stared up at him. Never had I seen him so angry. How much pain was he keeping inside that it had birthed such deep embedded rage and hatred?
“Liam, please... Calm down, nothing happened.”
“It better not have, because I assure you, if he touches you again, I will kill him.”
“Liam!” I cried out in shock, shoving him back. “He is your friend! How can you be so cruel?!”
“Oh darling, you haven‘t seen cruel.” He said, his voice was so dangerously calm and cold that it sent a shiver of fear through me.
His eyes darkened and my stomach twisted. The burning dark navy shade of his eyes was something I had never seen before. I backed away, my own heart thundering loudly.
He reached over suddenly, grabbing my shirt and yanking me towards himself roughly. In one swift moment, he ripped it right off of me, tossing it to the ground. Although not once did his gaze dip down as I crossed my arms over my chest, which was clad only in a black bra, I still felt humiliated. A surge of pain and hurt rushed through me but he simply glared coldly into my eyes.
Reaching over, he grabbed my chin, jerking my head upwards.
“Let me make this clear to you one final time... You are mine and only fucking mine.”